What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops