Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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01101110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01100101 01101100 01100101 01110110 01100101 01101110 translate here http://binarytranslator.com/

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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How do you fit 100 dead babies into a box? Put them into a blender.

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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Why are Anti-jokes funny? Coz they are not.

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Life

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Yo Mama just died.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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