If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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HELLO EVERYONE

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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