Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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What did Tiger Woods do when he saw a woman taking her shirt off? He looked the other way so he could make his birdie putt

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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whats the difference between a black rapist and a white rapist? the black rapist is black

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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a chinese man pays the full price

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Roses are red Roses are also white and Violets are Violet not blue. Also I'm a realist and your grandmother is going to die soon

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A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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