Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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What's brown an sticky Shit

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...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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