What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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Roses are red, yup.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

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A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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A man walks into a bar

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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