A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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