How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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How did the blonde die drinking milk? She was severely lactose intolerant.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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Frontbut-

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"How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door." "How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door." "The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which one?" "The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator." "There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat." "You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting."

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What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops