Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? A: Pick him up and suck on his wang!

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

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Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

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pudding

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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What did Jesus say when he made the first black person? What another perfect creation to this world!

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What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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