So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why was the boy crying? His parents were brutally burned to death in a fiery car accident.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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