Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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ur mum

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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Here's a joke for you, my life...

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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At least now we know, that most people are not like that, and with that sentence, my desire to see humanity as a whole happy, is dead. Thank you, you have made me realize that for each and every thing positive I have found within myself, I believed that I was simply learning more about how to be an average human being. I admire you, yet as painful it feels not to deny the truth, much of what I admire within you, reminds me of my self. Share that money with me, but as a gift, not as a contract, as a friend, not as someone buying me out, because my values might not be much, but for now, its what remains of the world I sought to create. Let us speak some other time, It was nice meeting you again Red, you always dig your way into my core, where I discover that I am stuck in life because I still sad deep inside, and then you take some of that sadness away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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