How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

I went to the principle's office because I had a hard time reading They tried to tell me I was lesdistic

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

Knock Knock! F*ck off

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

Girl fight: Teachers take them to dq Boy fight: Lunch and recess in the library.

mitchell palmer sucks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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