Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. A heated religious debate ensues in which everyone is uncomfortable and leaves questioning their own faith and fearing the unknown.

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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