How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Your adopted

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...