Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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If your reading this, youre not blind.

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Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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Rim Ram Ree, Kick him in the knee, Rim Ram Rass, Kick him in the other knee

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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