Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

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why am I writing this...im bored

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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Whats The difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? One's a dog ones a human. 363\

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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if life hands u melons, make melonade.

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What do you call a black jew? Overcooked

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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