Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

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Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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Death by kayak

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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