A man walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" The man replies "Surprise me." The bartender proceeds to mix cyanide with the mans drink and loses his bartending license and goes to prison for murdering a customer.

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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Heskey time.

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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kk

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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woman's rights

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops