Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

thumb_up thumb_down -33

- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops