Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

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why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Jimmy fell in mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jimmy took a bath with Bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a clown.

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Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We are all equal in the eyes of God.

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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Have you ever heard of a goose?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops