Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Obama

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. A heated religious debate ensues in which everyone is uncomfortable and leaves questioning their own faith and fearing the unknown.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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