Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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Invisible Children Foundation.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Another man asks him if hes ever seen the new movie that came out. he then replies, "i heard it" then curled up into a ball and cries for several hours.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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Q: What did the black guy say to the white guy? A: Nothing, he's a mute.

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Two people walk into Israel. The first is shot on the spot. The second screams "I only have two pennies in my pocket!" Immediately he is raped by five Jews.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

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OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

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I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

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Knock-knock? Who's there? I... I dunno I was planning on thinking of a joke before you said who's there, but I ran out of time.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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