What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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hi michael

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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