Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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European on my shoes, buddy.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Canadians

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"What the hell is wrong with you?" "..."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

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What did the farmer say when he found his tractor? "There's my tractor."

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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What did the boy's mother say to her daughter when she walked in on her father having sex with her grandmother? The grandfather said "how are you"? He wasn't a part of that fiasco. However I'm sure that whoever saw what was confused and looking for answers.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

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What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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