Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

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What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

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How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

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Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

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Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It followed a trail of bird feed that was strewn across the street.

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

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Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops