How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

yolo your orange looks orange

What do you get when you cross a gay eskimo and a black man? Nothing, as two male humans cannot reproduce.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

Knock Knock. Not home.

"I want a boyfriend for these cold winter nights" ... Shut up you slut go buy a blanket.

My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

AIDS

I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...