What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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What do you do with a Jewish kid with add( attention deficits disorder)? Send him to a concentration camp

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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What is 9+10? 19

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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