Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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nolan is gay

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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why was the black man on the bus? cause he needed to get to work

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

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Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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