Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

Guess what? You guessed it.

Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

Bob Saget that is all

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Happy Birthday! Your mom is dead!

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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