What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

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How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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The 80's called. They need their couch back.

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the fried chicken restaurant... BAWK BAWK cannibal

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

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What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

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lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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