How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

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Yo mama is so fat because she doesn't exercise and eats way too much calories. The reason fat people gain weight is because of low metabolism which means her body is not burning a lot of fat and instead is storing fat. A healthy life style such as playing sports, walking in a park, or eating healthy foods will benefit her from any medical complications in the future.

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What do short Mexicans do after a hot shower? Dry off with a towel like everyone else,

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

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2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

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Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

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What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

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Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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