Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

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What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

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Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

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How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops