so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

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A dyslexic Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. He hits his head on it and is rushed to the hospital,only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

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Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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Where's the soap?

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue U suck Dick Just Like Ur Dad did to u

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Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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