Your mom went to college

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

the economy.

What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says "Well, it's a long story but I tell you. You see, one day I was walking along the beach and I found a dusty old lamp. I rubbed the lamp and a big magic genie appeared. He told me I could have 3 wishes." The horse continues: "So I told the genie I wish I had a 10 billion dollars. I checked my bank account and sure enough it came true. My second wish was I wished for a beautiful wife. Suddenly a light came from the sky like an angel falling and I saw a beautiful woman and fell in love with her." The bartender says to the horse "Let me guess, so for your third wish, did you wish you were a horse with a long face?" The horse says "No that's not what I wished for." The bartender asks "What was your third wish?" The horse says "Well you won't believe me but I wished I was a bartender pretending to talk to a horse about some genie granting him wishes." After about 30 minutes of arguing with himself, other employees at the bar had had enough of the bartender talking to himself and called psychiatric personnel to escort the bartender to the mental hospital as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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