What's worse the a bee sting? Two bees stings What's worse the two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse the. The Holocaust? Three bee stings

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

knock knock? whos there? danielle danielle who? danielle the liar...hehe

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

Did you hear what happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.

What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

breasts

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

Knock knock. *Silence Knock knock *silence Knock knock *Silence KNOCK KNOCK. *Silence (Busts open door) Oh right I murdered Billy a week ago

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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