Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

Why did Hitler shoot himself He saw his his gas bill

Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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