roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one. It should only take one person to demonstrate such a simple task, regardless of their hair color.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

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One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

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Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops