David: Hey Bill. Do you know what the most common place for a Democrat to work is? Bill: No. David: An insane Asylum, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a black person to work is? Bill: No. David: A prison, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a 20th centrury undercover German Jew to work is? Bill: No. David: A morge, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a Scientologist to work is? Bill: No. David: With Democrats. (Writen by Ben, avid Anti-Scienctologist)

What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

What's purple, blue, red, orange, yellow and green. A rainbow .

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Banana soup, Gorilla poop

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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