I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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ure mama's so fat

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

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What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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What's green and red? A frog in a blender

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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So,a guy walks up to his friends at the bar and try's to to talk to them,the friends start being rasist ,so the first guy says 'wo guys stop going in that direction ,that one direction

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops