Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

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How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

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man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

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Cheese

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What does it mean when somebody is Jewish? They eat palahuardo por sinquevos for breakfast. Qua.

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hashtags suck balls

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

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A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

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Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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What's the difference between meat and fish? You can't beat your fish.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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"This is defamation!" proclaimed the Fox, as he sat in the panels of the courtroom. "I attest, with full honesty, Your Honor, that never have I said any of the allegations the two defendants have quoted upon me." He looked with contempt at the Ylvis brothers, who sat at the other end of the room. "I say, Your Honor," he continued, "that I never, ever in my entire life, said 'Gering-ding-ding-dingerdingerding', to which I am willing to testify."

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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Three men walked into a bar the other one ducked. SI

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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