why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops