A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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What goes in and out of a hole? A Rabbit you people have dirty minds!

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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what's the difference between a crocodile?

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Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

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What did the man say to the cat. ~It doesn't matter it impossible for 2 Species to Communicate between one another.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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