What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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Want to hear a scary story?' I was droppin a two ball and the monster walked in

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

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Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

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what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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