Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

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your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

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why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

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Is maynaise an instrument?

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

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Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

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Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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Obama = ebola

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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