Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

I had 99 problems Solved them all

Waseem is a hard worker.

Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

Is maynaise an instrument?

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

Obama = ebola

Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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