Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

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what do you call balls on richards chin? a dick in his mouth

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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