How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

TRICERATOPS!

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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