How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. What is Black, White, and Red all over?? A. A girl just having sex and her Cherry broke all over your dick..

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down -2

are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion A: Getting raped by three giant scorpion's

thumb_up thumb_down -2

One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar with his dog. He orders 14 shots and proceeds to drink. For each shot he takes, he feeds one to his dog, who accepts it willingly. The bartender says "Well I've never seen anything stranger. Why did you order 14 shots, and why are you giving half to your dog." "Well," says the man, "my 14 year old dog was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition. I cannot afford to put him down, so the shots should kill him." The dog then dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why are hurricanes named after women? I don't know I was asking you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops