- Anti Joke

What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

Obama = ebola

Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

Is maynaise an instrument?

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.