he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Knock knock. Its open.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops